When you ask questions, is it to tell people what they want to hear, to debate or show how smart you are, to reflect back what you are hearing or to illuminate our knowingness?
And what are you listening for? Is it to be liked, to identify facts and differences, to understand the experience of another or to allow a deeper wisdom to reveal itself?
Notice the difference in your relationships and results when you download, debate, dialogue or delve deep. For more check out Otto Schwarmer's work at MIT.